designer genes

welcome back to the OC

2005-07-26T12:37:00.000-07:00

Words cannot describe how excited we are that Laguna Beach is back. Maybe it's because one of us is from the OC, maybe it's because one of is could possibly/maybe/perhaps be moving to the OC in the near future, but it's most likely because we harbor the secret desire to be 18 and gossip about whether Stephen and Kristen should get back together while buying a $600 pair of shoes at Christian Dior in South Coast Plaza. (note: we were discussing aloud how someone spent $600 on shoes and a coworker replied "on shoes? how many shoes?", apparently not everyone understands the LB lifestyle) Sure, we may be six years older than these people, but we can still talk about them like we know them. Personally, this season I'm fighting for LC and Stephen to finally get together. Last night they went on a weird quasi-date thing that I didn't quite understand, but it was so cute how he kept telling her how pretty she was. They went to what appears to be the only restaurant in Laguna, being that everyone on the show frequents that place as if they don't have kitchens in their huge oceanfront mansions, which caused much confusion on my part when LC said at then end of the meal "I like this place, I'd never been here before". Huh? I shall have to refer to the season 1 DVD to verify this one. They ended up going back to her place and flirted in the very same hot tub we witnessed being built last season. Ahh, the memories.
I can't wait for the rest of the season, and I hope you will be enjoying it along with us. I forsee us talking about these peeps. A lot.

p.s. MTV aired a teaser preview for the second season of My Super Sweet 16, which starts next month. 16-year-old brat + gobs of money = pure entertainment.

I Heart Photoshop

2005-07-14T15:58:00.000-07:00

Voila! The debut of our new design is before you. Hope you enjoy, as it took a lot more coding and precious work hours than I had anticipated. Thanks to S for the excessive build-up. I aim to please.

photo-shop will NEVER go out of style

2005-07-12T15:59:00.000-07:00

My fellow cohort, we'll call her "J" for short, is currently in the process of using her photoshop skillz to concoct a fabulous logo for our blog. Yes, I use the term "fabulous" prematurely, and thus, some might say, am creating grounds for possible dissapointment. But, NO. I think that my choice of vernacular will actually serve as motivation for J; She will now strive to achieve... achieve what no human being has ever seen before. I do no exaggerate. I also do not take responsibility for the words I type.

Dr. Shaquille O'neal, Professor of Psychology of Demoralizing the Youth

2005-07-12T15:47:00.000-07:00

Shaq's message to Andrew Bynum, the Laker's 17-year old draft pick:

"Tell him Shaq doesn't respond to juvenile delinquents without a college degree. Tell him to get his degree and we can talk. In the meantime, he should call me Dr. Shaq because I'm working on my PhD."

Shaq recently earned his Master's from the University of Phoenix, and it has apparently changed his ego from quite large to out-of-control slash beyond-belief slash too-hot-for-TV.

I hear the University of Junction City has a good graduate program as well.

links links links

2005-06-02T14:48:00.000-07:00

As I spend perhaps more than some of my day browsing the internet, I occasionally come across some especially interesting sites that must be shared with the rest of the world. Since the whole "writing" aspect of the blog isn't going so well for us (as you can probably tell by our lack of updates), I'm gonna try posting some fun links every few days or so. Enjoy :)

fredflare.com - Some super cute stuff here. I'm a big fan of the iPod hoodies and the Mixx tote bags. Cute Cute Cute.
gofugyourself.com - For the fashion police in all of us. By far the best fashion commentary I've seen. Puts the mother and daughter Rivers trainwreck to some serious shame. Click on the Britney Spears section for some added enjoyment. Ahh, Britney, you deserve a post all to yourself....some other time maybe.
kottke.org - In case you get tired of listening to music or are in dire need of a mirror. Alternative uses for things are always handy. Oh, and the iPod hoodies mentioned earlier make an appearance.
oceanic-air.com - If you are a Lost fan, there are some cool hidden features that give clues about next season. Helps a bit during the long summer hiatus.

Dodgeball

2005-04-13T14:40:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the delayed re-cap this week. Sometimes we actually have work to do. As you may or may not remember from last week, "kiss my black ass" Karamo and the Miz were voted into the inferno. Now they have a chance to win the lifesaver in this week's challenge.
Apparently dodgeball is making a comeback. What with the box office hit starring Vince Vaughn and Ben Stiller (the term "hit" is used loosely here), "Extreme Dodgeball" showing in the wee hours on GSN, and now the MTV version, in the form of an Inferno challenge, "Dodge Yer Balls". Basically the two teams have to stand on platforms in the middle of the water and throw balls at each other until someone is left standing. Sounds like fun. MTV obviously adds in the water element to the vast majority of challenges to up the sex factor (did you really think Tonya in a bikini every week was just a coincidence?), because most of the time it's completely unnecessary. I'd actually love to be a part of their scripting meetings. I have a vision of a bunch of young MTV writers sitting around a table shooting off ideas for challenges based loosely on some type of sporting event, with a short, fat, balding guy in the corner adding "In the water! Have them do it in the water!" after every concept. Sick, really.
Anyhoo, there's something about splitting up each team into two groups, for the two rounds of dodgeball. It just so happens that each team's "good" team goes against the other's "bad" team. Everyone is getting into the water, headed toward the platform when the good guys spot a snake. Everyone runs screaming from the water, and Karamo lets out his true feelings. I'm probably making this quote up, but he said something similar to "Oh hell no am I getting my black ass in the water with no damn snakes! I don't like cold water and I don't like snakes! I don't feel like going in." and proceeded to sit down on the sand, arms crossed. Big surprise, Karamo ends up refusing to partake in the challenge. Nevertheless, the Bad Asses won. CT (B.Asses) and Landon (G.Guys) end up winning the lifesavers. At their group huddle, Mike makes it clear that he does NOT want Landon to save him from the Inferno. This is obvious foreshadowing, as Landon goes on to mentally prepare for the Inferno (listening to his iPod, flexing his upper body and making a series of Miz-like facial expressions). CT, on the other hand, makes it clear that he will in no way save Karamo. In a "shocking" twist, Landon winds up sacrificing himself to the Inferno to save Mike, but in the end wins the "knock each other's block off" competition in about 3.2 seconds. Karamo gives his team one more "kiss my black ass" for good measure, and is off. Displaying classic alpha-male behaviour, CT, Abe, and Derrick refuse to offer their goodbyes to Karamo. How manly of them.

Until next week, where it appears that Mike hooks up with Jamie. What else is new...

Superlative of the week: Best quote. "Lesbians always win dodgeball" -courtesy of Dan (turns out he wasn't lying)

Just because we feel like it, here's another superlative for you: Most blatant sexual innuendo made by MTV. This episode was centered around "snakes and balls". 'Nuff said.

why doncha do som'in'

2005-04-06T13:17:00.000-07:00

UPN has announced they will soon be showing a new documentary series entitled "White Trash America". Seriously, have a look.

Ask and you shall receive

2005-04-05T12:48:00.000-07:00

Thanks to the few of you who voted in our poll. It's nice to see that we so closely resemble the US presidential election when it comes to voter turnout. We pride ourselves on our democratic ways. And now, without further ado, we give you the much-anticipated winner, (drumroll please), MTV's The Inferno II:

We open with the dear departure of Beth, and sadly not the kind we'd all like it to be. We would elaborate, but to be honest with you, we missed the first 10 minutes of the show. Oops. We'll be better next week. Promise. So some stuff we didn't see happened, and then they wind up standing half-dressed on a balance beam (?) thing in the water. Apparently this is their challenge. They cross-dress for awhile, and Dan jumps in the water a few times for kicks... yada yada yada... the blue team (the good guys) win. Hooray! That was a lame challenge, no wonder the blue team won. We're actually thinking of staging the same challenge in the lab just to prove how lame it really was (minus the lake). We'll let you know the results as they come in.

Side note, here's some advice. If you're gonna go claim the winner's check, you best not fall in the water after taking 1.5 steps on a fairly wide balance beam (coughDarrellcough). That automatically cancels out the fact that you just won. Especially when Julie walks effortlessly right behind you. That's bad PR.

Now on to the good stuff. And by good stuff we mean "fun with editing" by the MTV peeps. The first notable incident begins with Karamo and CT furiously arguing about who they should vote into the inferno, Landon or Mike. All of a sudden Karamo yells out something about his "black ass" and CT throws out something about not using the "race card". MTV captures their rage with the classic slo-mo closeup shots and just when it looks like they're going to throw-down, MTV cuts to commercial. After we return from the PowerGirls preview for Thursday night, we wonder if we missed the fight. Why? Because everyone is fine. Civil even. This is not the showdown we were lead to believe was going to occur. Buzzkill.

Moving on, everyone announces who they voted into the inferno. The good guys (blue) pick Karamo and the bad asses (red) pick Mike (big surprise). Karamo is pissed because he was right about being the one voted into the inferno and no one on his team believed him, blah blah blah. The same thing everyone is pissed about on this show. Derrick and Karamo have a heart-to-heart (touching, really) with Derrick attempting to comfort Karamo by admitting that the rest of the team made a mistake in not listening to Karamo. However, we think that Derrick had ulterior motives. We'd start kissing ass too if we were caught in a corner with Karamo.

That's pretty much the show. Check out the aftershow on mtv.com for (ugh) another interview with Beth. She's got some balls though, I must admit. Wow.

Superlative of the week: Most improved since their original season. The award goes to CT. Despite the gay bouncer look he's been sporting (too many too tight blazers if you ask me), the shaved head and frequent trips to the gym have done him some good. We approve.

Happy Birthday Cesar

2005-03-31T16:55:00.000-08:00

FYI- Go ahead an park at a meter without paying! The Union Tribune is reporting that those particular ticket-dispensing govt. officials have today off, so no worries.

Side note- We do NOT get the day off. That's not fair. Anyone in California knows that Cesar is The Man... to say the least, I think so.

Side note #2- Have you noticed that most major cities in CA have a street named after Cesar?

Side note #3- A few years ago I needed help in a class, so I had to email my T.A. who hated me. The response was "My name is Cesar." That was it (oh, I had addressed it to "Caesar"). Technicalities.

Spring Time = Hoochie Mama Galore

2005-03-31T13:23:00.000-08:00

Cheetah's and the beach notwithstanding, most people might argue that the Gaslamp on a Friday night or PB any time of the day has the most scantily clad ladies. However, my money is on a different place- a place of higher learning, as they say- UCSD. I just went to the school to tie up a few loose ends, and I felt like a nun among the youngin's (and by youngin's i mean people 1-4 years younger than me). I am wearing an old gray sweatshirt with red shoes that don't have a chance in hell of matching any item in my closet. To be honest, all of the people in this lab dress for temperatures in the negatives because the air conditioner is off the heezy here. But, really, that is beside the point because I think that the young women at UCSD are just more hoochified this year. I was at the registar's office and there were girls in their platforms/high heels and haltertops trying to add/drop classes. Come on! Platforms? Maybe those would fly on a Friday, but it's Thursday for crying out loud! And it's UCSD! Plain and simple, there was a serious exposed flesh to clothing ratio around campus. I'd say it was about 2:1 (the guys made this number more respectable because, unfortunately, carson kressley hasn't given the ok for men to start sportin' tube tops). Kids these days, or maybe it's that I'm getting too old. No, it's the kids.

-s

We Love Trashy Television...

2005-03-29T15:27:00.000-08:00

...but not as much as we like to gossip about trashy television. Vote for you favorite show in the poll below and we will review it for you weekly, free of charge.

Baby Beyonce

2005-03-25T12:02:00.000-08:00

This is a must see if you don't mind child exploitation. C'mon, it's cute.

see for yourself

Oops, she did it again

2005-03-24T16:04:00.000-08:00

As you can see, Britney has certainly let herself go in recent weeks, actually more like months. We predict that she and Mr. Spears's next property purchase will be of the mobile variety. We're not judging, though. Who are we kidding, of course we are. If you liked that picture of Britney, there's more where that came from.

Note to self: Learn how to format pictures.

2005-03-24T16:02:00.000-08:00

In her defense, they say that green is the new black.

weboggle

2005-03-24T15:14:00.000-08:00

Weboggle is our current online game of choice. Check it out. Seriously. Maybe you'll even find us playing at this very moment.

On a side note, our co-worker once asked us if we wanted to partake in a game of "WE-boggle." Being that it is a game of Boggle on the Web, we personally would've called it "WEB-boggle." Potato Potaaaato, I guess.

a little bit about us

2005-03-24T14:44:00.000-08:00

Mike check 1 2...

Here's our deal: we are 2 fools who have decided to start a blog. Plain and simple. Wanna know about us? Unfortunately we choose not to divulge too much information because we do not feel like getting fired anytime in the near future. All we can say is that we work in the field of science. Now you're wondering, huh? Don't worry, we're not cloning babies or anything.

Anyhoo, we plan on posting interesting tidbits for your reading pleasure whenever we feel so inclined. And by interesting, we mean what we personally find interesting. Yes, that was a disclaimer. Check back as often as you like, and spread the word. Let's face it, everyone gets bored at work and there are only so many times you can check your email. Enjoy.